I owe my readers an apology. You deserve better from me and I’ll tell you what I mean: I’ve recently started reading other wine blogs, and I haven’t been living up to the industry standards. In reading these blogs, I’ve found that you’re not a legit wine blogger without using fancy words like “synergy” or “palate” and talking about different parts of a sip of wine like the “crisp finish.”
I’m just a simple man. And until now, I’ve gotten by in life solely on my charm and good looks. Now this may sound ridiculous to you, but keep in mind that my charm and good looks are astounding. This has meant that learning how to properly “identify undertones” and use terms like “it has a delicate nose” when I mean “I don’t smell anything” have been irrelevant to my success as a human being…until now. In order to blog about wine the way other wine experts who would be irate that I just grouped myself into the phrase “wine experts” I need to set the bar higher for my own class and culture.
So here’s my pledge to you:
I’ll learn those fancy words.
I’ll stop saying things like “This pinot noir is wicked awesome”
And finally, I’ll try to figure out what the heck a “finish” is. Is that like when you’re drinking a tall boy of Mickey’s and by the time you get to the bottom it’s warm and the “finish” tastes like a dumpster? I’m guessing that’s what it is.
Anyway, tonight’s dinner with a wine-maker is sold out, so I can’t do a lot to help you out there, but they’re having another one soon.
Wednesday night is game night, and I’ll there with my team, which you may know as the 2-Time Defending Champions. If you feel like adding to our wine rack, come down and lose! Okay full disclosure: We’re without our closer this week. He was called up to the bigs. And by “bigs” I mean “a sales conference in Tuscon”. What I’m saying is you may have a chance, although full disclosure again: we’ve got a ringer to replace him.
We only have a few tables left, so email (firstname.lastname@example.org) me if you’d like me to reserve one for you. If you reserve a table, I’ll buy your first appetizer of the night.